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Authored by: Eda Gordbis, PhD, LMFT, and Bradley Bohall, BS
For many young men, fitness begins in a healthy place. They want to feel stronger, improve their health, build confidence, or become more disciplined. Going to the gym, learning about nutrition, and setting physical goals can all be positive parts of a person’s life.
But for some men, the pursuit of fitness slowly becomes something else. Exercise stops feeling like a choice and starts feeling like a requirement. Missing one workout can lead to guilt or panic. Looking in the mirror becomes a repeated test that is never passed. A body that is already healthy, strong, or muscular may still feel too small, too soft, or not “masculine” enough.
This is where fitness can become fear.
When Body Image Distress Hides Behind “Discipline”
Muscle dysmorphia is a form of body dysmorphic disorder (BDD) in which a person becomes preoccupied with the belief that their body is too small, insufficiently muscular, or not lean enough. Although others may see the person as fit or muscular, the individual may feel inadequate, weak, or ashamed of their appearance. Muscle dysmorphia is often discussed in the context of fitness or gym culture, but it can affect people in many settings, including school, work, dating, relationships, and everyday social situations.
This can be especially difficult to recognize in men because many of the behaviors associated with muscle dysmorphia can look socially acceptable, or even admirable, from the outside. Spending hours at the gym, following a strict diet, tracking nutrition, avoiding certain foods, or constantly trying to “bulk” or “cut” may be praised as dedication. However, the underlying motivation matters.
Healthy fitness is usually flexible. It can adapt to a person’s life, relationships, school, work, and physical health. Muscle dysmorphia is more rigid. The person may feel driven by anxiety, shame, or the fear of not being big enough. The gym may no longer be a place of enjoyment or health, but a way to temporarily quiet distress.
The Role of Social Media and Modern Fitness Culture
Young men today are exposed to an endless stream of idealized male bodies. In the past, these images were mostly limited to movies, magazines, or advertisements. Now, they are available all day through social media, fitness influencers, transformation videos, and supplement/exercise clothing ads.
This matters because many of these bodies are presented without context. A young man scrolling through his phone may see influencers or actors with extremely muscular and lean physiques and assume those bodies are realistic, common, and achievable through discipline alone. What is often left out are the factors behind the image: genetics, years of training, professional coaching, strict dieting, lighting, editing, posing, temporary dehydration, and, in some cases, performance-enhancing substances.
Superhero movies and fitness influencer culture can intensify this pressure. These physiques may be entertaining on screen, but they can also create distorted expectations for real life. When young men repeatedly compare themselves to bodies produced under extraordinary conditions, their own healthy bodies may begin to look inadequate.
This does not mean social media causes BDD by itself. BDD is a serious mental health condition with complex psychological, biological, and social factors. But social media and gym culture can worsen body dissatisfaction, increase comparison, and reinforce the belief that a man’s worth is tied to being bigger, leaner, or more muscular.
Warning Signs That Fitness May Be Becoming Anxiety
It is not always easy to tell the difference between commitment to fitness and a developing body image problem. Some warning signs may include:
- Spending excessive time checking mirrors, taking body photos, or comparing one’s body to others online.
- Feeling intense guilt, panic, or irritability after missing a workout.
- Avoiding social events, dating, school, work, or activities because of concerns about looking too small or not lean enough.
- Following rigid food or exercise rules that interfere with daily life.
- Continuing to train despite injury, exhaustion, or medical concerns.
- Frequently seeking reassurance about body size, muscularity, or appearance.
- Using risky supplements, steroids, or other substances to change the body.
- Feeling that no amount of progress is ever enough.
One of the most painful parts of muscle dysmorphia is that the goal keeps moving. A person may gain muscle, become leaner, or receive compliments, but the relief does not last. The mind quickly finds another flaw, another comparison, or another reason the body is still not good enough.
Why Men May Struggle to Talk About It
Many men feel embarrassed to admit they are struggling with body image. They may worry that others will see them as vain, weak, or superficial. Some may not recognize the problem as anxiety or BDD because their behaviors are reinforced by the culture around them. Friends may praise their discipline. Social media may reward their appearance. Gym culture may normalize constant comparison.
This can make it harder for men to ask for help. Instead of saying, “I am anxious about my body,” they may say, “I just need to get bigger,” “I need to be more disciplined,” or “I will feel better once I reach my goal.”
But when distress remains no matter how much the body changes, the problem may not be the body itself. The problem may be the anxiety, shame, and distorted self-perception attached to it.
What Helps
The goal of treatment is not to make someone stop caring about fitness or health. Rather, the goal is to help the person build a healthier, more flexible relationship with their body.
Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), including exposure-based approaches, can help people with BDD gradually reduce compulsive behaviors such as mirror checking, reassurance-seeking, avoidance, and constant comparison. Treatment may also focus on shame, perfectionism, rigid beliefs about appearance, and the fear of being judged by others. Medication, particularly serotonin reuptake inhibitors, can also be helpful for many people suffering from body dysmorphic disorder.
Loved ones can help by responding with compassion while avoiding repeated reassurance about appearance, which may reduce anxiety briefly but often strengthens the cycle over time. Because many people with BDD may not see the purpose of mental health treatment at first, family members can encourage help by focusing on how a professional can support them in managing the distress that interferes with school, work, dating, relationships, and the life they want to live.
Moving Toward a Healthier Standard
Fitness can be a meaningful part of life. It can support mental health, physical health, confidence, and community. But fitness should not create a cycle of unattainable goals.
Young men deserve to know that many of the bodies they see online and on screen are not fair standards for everyday life. They also deserve to know that if the pursuit of getting bigger, leaner, or more muscular has become a source of anxiety, shame, or isolation, help is available.
The goal is not to give up strength. The goal is to build a life where strength is not measured only by appearance, and where a person’s worth is not determined by the size or composition of their body.
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