How To Know If Your Therapist is Really Helping You

How To Know If Your Therapist is Really Helping You

Karen Cassiday, PhD, ACT

Karen Cassiday PhD

Karen Cassiday, PhD, ADAA Past President's areas of interest are anxiety disorders in children and teens, social anxiety disorder, treatment-refractory OCD, and working with children and teens who suffer from both developmental concerns and anxiety disorders. Her research has focused on information processing in posttraumatic stress disorder and cognitive-behavioral treatment of anxiety disorders in children, teens, and adults.

Dr. Karen Cassiday is a lively, sought-after speaker and commentator on national media such as Nightline, The Today Show, Animal Planet, The Joy Behar Show, Huffington Post, public radio and many more. She is a TEDx speaker who shared her personal experience as a mother overcoming her own anxious perfectionism in the middle of Walt Disney World! She is the host of the Moms Without Worry radio show. She served as the President of the Anxiety and Depression Association of America and is the founder of the Anxiety Treatment Center of Greater Chicago, the longest-running clinic to first use modern exposure-based treatment for anxiety disorders in the Chicago region. She won the Anxiety and Depression Association of America’s prestigious Clinician of Distinction Award and is a Clinical Fellow. She is also a Diplomate and Founding Fellow of the Academy of Cognitive Therapy, served as Chair of the Scientific Advisory Board of the Chicago OCD Foundation/Beyond OCD, and has been listed on numerous Who’s Who lists.  She has published numerous scientific articles and articles on parenting and managing anxiety. Dr. Cassiday is dedicated to helping mothers overcome the cultural pressure to be perfect and to raise perfect kids. She enjoys using her expertise from over thirty years in the field to help families overcome the dilemmas of parenting in a high-stress digital world. Her goal is to help all mothers embrace the messy hilarity of parenting with unshakable self-confidence so they can raise kids who thrive!

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Many people wonder if their therapy is really helping them overcome their problem. Why? They often have therapists who tell them that they are doing well, but their therapist does not make clear to them what they mean by making progress. Does it mean facing your emotions, being able to talk about difficult things, or does it mean that you feel better and function better? Many people also like their therapist’s kindness and empathy, but feel guilty about questioning the outcome because their therapist is so nice even though they are not getting better. Unless you clarify with your therapist what a good outcome is at the start of therapy by mentioning your goals and agree what recovery looks like, then you may be likely to go to therapy for years without any noticeable improvement in your daily life. So, here are some hot tips for questions to ask to determine is your therapist is really helpful.

  1. How will you help me get better?
  2. Why are you using the methods or modalities that you use to help me get better?
  3. Is there any research that shows that the way that you will work with me is likely to help my problem(s)?
  4. How long will it take for me to expect noticeable improvement?
  5. What will I have to do to get noticeable improvement?
  6. What will you do if I plateau and do not see changes in my every day life?
  7. What do the steps to recovery look like?
  8. When do you refer patients for evaluation for medication? Other therapies?
  9. What do you think make it difficult for patient like me to recover?
  10. How will you measure my progress?
  11. Will you help me practice doing real life skills that are necessary for recovery, or will you just tell me what to do, or talk about what I should do?
  12. What will you do if I have difficulty doing your recommended home practice?
  13. Do you assign home practice?

Some things that suggest that your therapist may be less than helpful are the following:

  1. You complain about not being able to make any significant progress and your therapist tells you that you have to process the problem emotionally before you can expect any changes
  2. Your therapist talks a lot and does not have you talking and doing new things that help you make progress
  3. You like your therapist and think that they are really nice, but you never really get down to working on the actual behaviors that make your life difficult
  4. Your therapist tells you that your brain scans or blood values have improved but you do not feel or function any better
  5. Your therapist tells you that you are expecting too much and that your condition is chronic, or that nothing more can be done to help you
  6. Your therapist tells you that if you could get to the problem underneath your issues, then you would be able to recover
  7. You therapist tells you that you are in denial about the true issues underlying your problem and that you need to do more therapy in order to get better
  8. You have not experienced any noticeable progress after two month of treatment-most treatments that are effective should show some progress within several weeks to several months
  9. You disagree with your therapist’s ideas about the problem and their explanations do not make sense to you.

Karen Cassiday, PhD, ACT

Karen Cassiday PhD

Karen Cassiday, PhD, ADAA Past President's areas of interest are anxiety disorders in children and teens, social anxiety disorder, treatment-refractory OCD, and working with children and teens who suffer from both developmental concerns and anxiety disorders. Her research has focused on information processing in posttraumatic stress disorder and cognitive-behavioral treatment of anxiety disorders in children, teens, and adults.

Dr. Karen Cassiday is a lively, sought-after speaker and commentator on national media such as Nightline, The Today Show, Animal Planet, The Joy Behar Show, Huffington Post, public radio and many more. She is a TEDx speaker who shared her personal experience as a mother overcoming her own anxious perfectionism in the middle of Walt Disney World! She is the host of the Moms Without Worry radio show. She served as the President of the Anxiety and Depression Association of America and is the founder of the Anxiety Treatment Center of Greater Chicago, the longest-running clinic to first use modern exposure-based treatment for anxiety disorders in the Chicago region. She won the Anxiety and Depression Association of America’s prestigious Clinician of Distinction Award and is a Clinical Fellow. She is also a Diplomate and Founding Fellow of the Academy of Cognitive Therapy, served as Chair of the Scientific Advisory Board of the Chicago OCD Foundation/Beyond OCD, and has been listed on numerous Who’s Who lists.  She has published numerous scientific articles and articles on parenting and managing anxiety. Dr. Cassiday is dedicated to helping mothers overcome the cultural pressure to be perfect and to raise perfect kids. She enjoys using her expertise from over thirty years in the field to help families overcome the dilemmas of parenting in a high-stress digital world. Her goal is to help all mothers embrace the messy hilarity of parenting with unshakable self-confidence so they can raise kids who thrive!

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