From Darkness to Purpose: How I Overcame Anxiety, Depression, and Alcoholism to Help Other Men

02.20.2025

From Darkness to Purpose: How I Overcame Anxiety, Depression, and Alcoholism to Help Other Men

by Christopher Fontana

Growing up on Long Island, I had what many would call an ideal childhood. I was surrounded by a loving family, good friends, and a bright future ahead of me. But life has a way of throwing unexpected challenges our way. At the age of 13, my world was shattered when I lost my father. The man who had been my role model, my protector, and my guide was suddenly gone. At that age, I didn’t have the emotional maturity to process such a profound loss, so I buried my pain deep inside. I put on a brave face, but inside, I was lost.

As the years went on, that unresolved grief started to manifest in ways I couldn’t control. I struggled in school, eventually failing out of college. I had no direction, no purpose, and no motivation. Instead of facing my emotions, I turned to alcohol. What started as casual drinking quickly spiraled into a destructive habit. Alcohol became my escape from reality, my way of numbing the pain and anxiety that had taken root deep within me. But numbing the pain came at a cost, physically, mentally, and emotionally.

My drinking led to severe weight gain, and before I knew it, I was over 300 pounds. Every day felt like a battle. I experienced crippling anxiety attacks that left me feeling like I was dying. My mind constantly raced with negative thoughts, self-doubt, and fear. Depression consumed me, making even the smallest tasks feel impossible. I was stuck in a vicious cycle, drink to escape, wake up filled with regret, and repeat. My life was slipping away, and deep down, I knew I had to make a change or risk losing everything.

The turning point came when I realized that no one was coming to save me. If I wanted to change, I had to take responsibility for my life. It wasn’t easy. It started with small steps. Acknowledging my struggles, committing to sobriety, and focusing on my mental and physical health. I sought knowledge about mindset, personal growth, and fitness. I surrounded myself with people who inspired me instead of dragging me down. But there was still something affecting me.

After all the doctor visits checking my heart and them telling me there was nothing physically wrong with me, I knew I had to speak to someone. It was the first time in my life I showed vulnerability, and by showing vulnerability I found strength! I forced myself to sit with my emotions instead of running from them.

Talking to a psychiatrist helped me tremendously, more than I thought it would. I was put on a low dose of Xanax and Lexapro to help with the physical symptoms of anxiety. It made me feel normal again, I was able to do my everyday activities, work out in the gym, and go on a run for more than five minutes without thinking I was going to drop dead of a heart attack. I was able to shift to an action first mindset and everything changed!

As the weight came off, my mind became clearer. I learned that true growth comes from discipline, from showing up every single day, even when the motivation isn’t there. I faced my fears, my doubts, and my past head-on. And through that process, I found a new purpose: to help other men who feel stuck in the same darkness I once did.

Today, I am a sober mental health advocate, 100 pounds lighter, and stronger than I’ve ever been, physically, mentally, and emotionally. I founded Go Primal Lifestyle to inspire men to refuse to settle, to take control of their lives, and to become the best version of themselves for the people who need them most.

I submitted my story to ADAA in hopes to inspire people, men in particular, to refuse to settle in life. Through my story I hope to inspire and equip people with the same tools and practices that helped me tremendously!

My story is not just about overcoming adversity; it’s about proving that no matter how dark things get, there is always a way forward. It starts with a decision. A decision to rise. A decision to fight. A decision to refuse to settle for anything less than the life we are meant to live.