Sobriety and Meditation: Finding My Purpose after Drug Abuse

08.24.2024

Sobriety and Meditation: Finding My Purpose after Drug Abuse

by Pat Smith

I grew up in Elkhart, Indiana, where I spent my childhood playing sports, hanging out with friends, and doing well academically. I graduated in 2015 with a BS in Business Management from Indiana University. Despite outward success, I had been abusing drugs and alcohol since middle school, a habit I developed to escape emotions I didn’t know how to handle.

It started at 13 with marijuana and progressed to harder drugs in high school, like Xanax and Percocet. I excelled in academics and sports but was almost never sober, which fueled anxiety and negative thought loops. By the time I reached college, I was using MDMA and cocaine several times a week, lost in a cycle of substance abuse to cope with my inner turmoil. Surprisingly, I graduated with an above-average GPA and landed a corporate job, but my anxiety worsened as I realized my habits couldn’t continue in the working world. I quit drugs and alcohol, but sobriety brought new challenges, particularly in handling my racing thoughts and emotions without my usual crutches.

My outlet became the gym, where I focused intensely on my physical health. This newfound discipline helped alleviate some of my anxiety. In spring 2016, I made a bold move to Charlotte, NC, to start fresh with my cousin Alec, someone I greatly admired. However, upon my arrival, I received devastating news: Alec had died in a car accident. My world was shattered, and I was left alone in a new city, struggling with immense grief.

I turned to drinking and drugs again to cope, but the pain of packing Alec’s belongings and the reality of his loss was overwhelming. I moved back to Indiana, lost and deeply affected by the tragedy. I spiraled into deeper substance abuse until I hit rock bottom. This was my turning point. I knew I had to change or continue suffering indefinitely. I found a new job and discovered the world of personal development, realizing that my physical health improvements weren’t enough to overcome my mental struggles.

I began meditating and listening to personal development podcasts like Lewis Howes and Ed Mylett. Slowly, meditation became a habit, helping me manage my emotions better. I shifted my focus from external appearances to internal growth, finding a new purpose in improving my overall well-being.

In 2018, I decided to pursue a Holistic Nutrition Consultant Certification at Bauman College while working full-time. This holistic approach to life—balancing physical, mental, and emotional health—brought profound positive changes. Meditation, proper diet, and a commitment to staying sober transformed me into a person focused on personal and professional growth, a stark contrast to the self-destructive path I had once been on.

Fast forward to now (2024), I’ve become a certified trainer under meditation expert Dr. Joe Dispenza. The impact meditation had on my life is profound, leading me to create a coaching business focused on helping ambitious professionals improve their mental and emotional well-being. This work is personal, as it’s my way of serving those in the position I once was. After nearly two years in business, I’ve helped almost 100 individuals thrive in all areas of their lives.

I wanted to share my story with ADAA to let others know anxiety and depression are not the end, there is always light at the end of the tunnel if we look for it.