LuLaRoe Fundraiser

02.16.2018

LuLaRoe Fundraiser

The weekend of October 31, 2014, I was hit hard with Panic Disorder. Panic attacks one after another, all weekend long. Even my throat "fell asleep". You know, that feeling when Novacaine is about to wear off. Before that, it was gradual. It all started while driving to Virginia for my Uncle's 50th birthday party. I never made it there. I was on I-83 and had a full blown panic attack on 8/23/14. Of course, I didn't know what it was. I just kept saying to myself, "I don't feel right, I don't feel right." Shaking, sweaty, felt like I was driving a simulator, super thirsty, etc.... It was a rainy day, and I never enjoyed driving in rain on highways from the gate. I called 911, and even talking to that guy calmed me down. Then I moved on to calling my Dad, because I wasn't about to leave my car sitting on I-83. I got off an exit and ended up in some town in Maryland that starts with a T, got some food at McDonald's, then drove back home, incident free, but boy I was tired when I got home. I thought it was a one time thing, until I had some mild attacks while doing everyday driving. Not often, but I knew something was "off." Then, Halloween weekend 2014, I had one panic attack after another after another. It took a while to figure out why I felt out of sorts all weekend. After that, it was a big deal when I managed to just drive my car around the block for street cleaning (when I still lived in the city). Anything I didn't like in general, waiting in lines, crowds, traffic, driving in rain (day or night), and feeling rushed, being bossed around by a certain someone at work that wasn't even a boss of any kind, would do me in.

Fast forward 3 years after much therapy, meds that work, and I'm at about what I think is 80%. I felt I needed a hobby that was more meaningful. Something that kept my mind off life in general, kept my mind off the day job, etc.

Cleaning, coloring & playing Nintendo Classic gets old after a while, and since I'm often times too tired to do some of the hobbies I used to enjoy, and know I would be too tired for a 2nd job (and I know there are people out there that need that job more than me), I thought, "Shoot, I can be a LuLaRoe independent fashion consultant! Something with a purpose, with making money as my motivator, and it would be fun and low stress!" I'm a Capricorn. We are ambitious, goal-oriented, and like money. We don't like to spend it, we just like it.

Today just happened to be my last day at my "day job", Government/Non-Profit Accounting. It was literally killing me. I was doing pretty well at that 80% level, then I discovered after a leave of absence that my boss recommended, I realized that it was indeed my job that was making my anxiety and panic come back. Not to where I was at the beginning, but I was afraid it would get there again. I made a decision for my own health, and in the best interest of my employer, that it was time for me to "retire" after 21 years. I'm only 40. I'm just retiring from that type of work. I am now going to go full force with LuLaRoe and see where that takes me, now that I have all the time in the world to invest in that. I also have some low stress side gigs lined up: Doing taxes for friends, babysitting for short clips, and cleaning, because I actually like cleaning. If I need to find a super flexible part-time job that can accommodate my needs, I will. We will see what occurs in the next few months. I firmly believe that everything happens for a reason. There must be some reason why my plight with anxiety (and sometimes I wonder if a little bit of depression pops up), has made me choose a new path.

I actually first heard about ADAA through one of those Facebook Birthday Fundraisers. I raised $140 from that. $20 was from me. Before I did the birthday fundraiser, I checked out the website and saw that it is a great resource for folks to go to if they think they might be experiencing any of the conditions mentioned. Also, it's a great place to go to find out how to make it "go away". I know there are plenty of folks out there still fighting anxiety, panic disorder, depression, OCD, PTSD and more on their own. Or worse yet, "self-medicating."