Seeking the Light

Seeking the Light

by Edward Feigel

I didn’t know that what I was experiencing was called depression until I was in my early forties, although with the benefit of hindsight I have come to realize that I have been dealing with it for almost my entire life. I know that many life experiences have contributed to it, augmented by the fact that biology laid the groundwork for its development over the years. I obtained this insight from my psychiatrist, who I’ve been seeing for almost 20 years. 

Depression has diminished my sense of myself to the point where I became over reliant on the attitudes of others. I have made life choices, ill-considered though they were, that allowed me to feel some degree of safety. Nevertheless, feelings of sadness, inadequacy, and pessimism about life have endured. 

Thanks to my psychiatrist, I have learned to deal with these feelings through therapy and medication. Also, my regimen of 200 mg/day of Zoloft has been beneficial in addressing the organic causes of my distress. 

I am grateful for ADAA for providing me the opportunity to share my feelings. I look forward to continuing to read about the experiences of other sufferers of depression and continuing my personal story. 


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