Suicide

I found that treating the person, talking to the person, and seeing the person was the best and most effective way to deliver care. They were people, not merely patients.

I made this video for others to see a different perspective of how suicide can impact a family. A widow's perspective. I want to share my story in hopes that it will give someone the feeling of validation and understanding.

Trigger Warning 

My mental illness began to show signs the day I turned 14. Prior to this, I lived a good life. I wasn’t extremely happy but I was content. I had some friends, I did well in school, and my family relationships were ok. But on my 14th birthday, this all changed.

I was one of those “strong” friends - on the outside. And I realize now how important it is to check in on your strong friends. Check in on the people in your life that seem like they are handing the uncertainties of life with grace and poise.

I woke up that day in early September feeling okay at first but around 8am, I became very depressed for no reason I could say exactly. I told my mother (grandmother) that I was going to go for a walk, but I had another plan. There is a 15–20-foot lighthouse by a lake near where I live. It is a truly beautiful place but, on this day, it wasn't so beautiful. 

This is my story with stress and anxiety, two words that can affect so many. Although never truly understanding the meaning of these two words at a young age, the older I got, the more I understood the impact they can have on one’s life.